the manhOrse in winter

With apologies to lesser men, here are at least 13 true facts about Aubrey Huff, who retired Saturday but remains Blog of Team’s favorite player of recent memory, with perhaps an exception or two that will not herein be discussed.
– born in 1976, Aubrey Lewis Huff grew up in a trailer park near Fort Worth, Texas. His favorite athlete growing up was Rangers fireballer Nolan Ryan
– when Aubrey was six years old, his father was killed while “trying to play peacemaker to a man and woman he had never met” who were having a domestic dispute
– After his father was killed, young Aubrey asked his mother for a batting cage. He wanted to be a baseball player. He must have had natural talent because he was no “workout warrior”
– Aubrey OBP’d at a .342 clip (good) and OPS’d at .806 (real good) over a 13-year major league career and hit 242 home runs. It’s not easy to hit 242 home runs in the Big Leagues and only a relatively small handful of humans have done better
– the 2007 death of his good friend, Rays pitcher Joe Kennedy, affected him deeply and Aubrey, who joined the Orioles after the 2006 season, took Kennedy’s No. 17 thereafter. Aubrey was a 5th-round draft pick in 1998
– later that year, a reeling Aubrey, whilst drinking vodka/Red Bulls on a radio show in Florida, was asked “is Baltimore a baseball town?” In reply he called Baltimore a “horseshit city.” It became a thing of lore
– after Charm City showered Aub with a veritable orgasm of indignant opprobrium related to said radio show commentary, Aub hit .304 in 2008 while OPS’ing at a .912 clip and swatting 34 home runs for Team. In 2009 Aub was traded at the deadline for some guy. He fared poorly in Detroit before his ship would come in
– Huff sings country – or used to anyway
– it has been reported that, along with a tattoo of his father, Aubrey has a man-horse tattoo


– in 2010, after signing a one-year, $3 million deal with the San Francisco Giants, Aub would pair with fellow “water buffalo” Pat Burrell and the pair would help the young-ish Giants club their way to an unanticipated World Series title. Huff is credited with helping put the series out of reach with a monstrous, two-run home run off of Ranger’s hurler Tommy Hunter on Oct. 31 of that year. That magical year he also proved he could hustle when necessary. Aub, minus Pat the Bat, would assume minor role in a 2nd World Series run with the Giants in 2012
– he has battled an anxiety disorder, which became more acute during his first year after signing a big, post-World Series contract with the Giants after the 2010 title
– Aubrey Huff has been known to wear a rally thong

Sneakin’ rally through the alley

– As a big-league ballplayer, Aub earned roughly $58 million in total player play. He would play nearly 1,500 regular season games before playing in a post-season game (see NYT article, linked above). In his retirement-related comments, Aub suggests he is embarking on broadcast career. You’ll do great. Blog knows it

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